Retrieval (again)

I went under this morning for my second ever egg retrieval. After a slow start on the left ovary, the latest sono had shown some 20 mature follicles and several more that were right on the verge. This morning, we got 21 eggs. Only 12 were mature, and 5 more could mature in culture, but just like last time, I'm really not counting on it. Hopefully, we will have a good crop of embryos on Tuesday. I feel like if we are lucky enough to get to a 3 day transfer, that's all I can ask.

The second time around, I knew a little better what to expect and we mentioned to the anesthesiologist that waking up was so hard last time. Brutal, in fact. Last time, I was shaking violently for 30 minutes and I had no clue about anything. Whatever this guy did, he did it well, and I woke up warm and more or less aware.

A friend of mine kept ARB while we were busy in the hospital. MTB and I considered trying to tag team her, but in the end, it seemed better that she didn't have to spend the morning in the hospital with all the germs. ARB did well and didn't cry much except when my friend walked more than 2 feet away. My baby girl is so easy going, and I'm glad that she wasn't stressed out.

Sooo, at this point, transfer is scheduled for 12:30 Tuesday afternoon. At least, I really hope so.

Afraid

I have no idea if I felt this way last time or not. I've looked back on that cycle, and it seems that I was pretty bloated by this time, but now, I feel cramps where my ovaries would be. Did I feel cramps last time too? I just don't remember, but this is really freakin' me out. I wonder if I'm not ovulating early perhaps.

As for the trigger, it went well given that I messed up. During my appointment yesterday, the nurse mixed the trigger shot, and I was supposed to put it in the fridge when I got home. I forgot. When we got home, it was time for ARB to eat and I had to take my last Follistim injection and I completely forgot the shot in my purse for about 5 or 6 hours. When I did think about it, I put it in the fridge and let it go. Fast forward a few hours until after RE's office closed. I started to worry about the shot. Did I mess it up? I Google. Dr. Google and his many amateur assistants have conflicting stories... some say that as long as it's used within 12 hours of mixing, it should be okay but some say that the effectiveness may be compromised. I panic. I call RE on his cell phone, and he returns my call within 2 minutes. As long as the temperature in our home didn't get into the 90's, I should be okay. Then he tells me that he had to have some sort of emergency procedure done on his right eye, and he will be wearing a bandage during ER on Saturday. Uhm. What?

Arrgghhh, an RE with a patch - I'm trying to ignore the fact that he will be wielding a giant needle in and around my girly bits. Ahoy, Matie.

And MTB did make it home in time to give me the trigger. He did a good job, and I didn't feel a thing.

Trigger

Trigger tonight. According to this morning's sono, I have 20 follies ready to go, but my E2 levels tell me that we probably won't get 20 mature/quality eggs. I'm hoping for a good harvest, a good fert report and a 3 day transfer. MTB is in Houston today and he probably won't be home in time to give me the trigger shot so I'll have to do it myself.


I really hope this works.

Follie check - part four

Today's follie check revealed 30 measurable follicles! 30!! Not all will contain an egg and not all eggs will be mature, but it's looking good so far. I have about 15 follies on each side with the biggest measuring about 20mm. I have 9 more between 16-19mm and several, several more between 12-15mm. I hope there are at least a few good ones in there because I'm not convinced that I could do this again anytime soon. Trigger is expected tomorrow although MTB is planning a trip to Houston so I may end up giving the trigger to myself. Not fun, but I could probably handle it.

Retrieval is expected Saturday morning, and MTB and I have been going back and forth about what to do with ARB during that time. At first, we thought we could just tag team her, but as the reality sets in, we realize that we probably need to find someone to care for her. We don't have family in town so it's not like we have built-in babysitters. I talked w a friend of mine who lives about 3 miles from the hospital where we will be Saturday morning, and she has agreed, in theory, to watch Adele. She agreed not knowing that we will need to be at the hospital by 6 am. My friend is not much of a morning person, so we'll see if she's still interested.

How I'm doing

Cray-zeee! That pretty much sums it up. The meds have fried every last nerve when it comes to everyone except ARB. MTB can't seem to do anything without it absolutely driving me crazy. We talked last night, and I mentioned that we haven't been talking enough lately and that's never good.

On a completely different note, MTB provided a semen sample at the lab yesterday. The lab is located at a hospital about 30 miles away, and since our last cycle, it's been acquired by another hospital system. Last time, MTB walked in and after some trouble actually finding the right place, he did the deed and left. This time, he actually had to register. He spent nearly an hour in admitting and had a bracelet. He said the bracelet didn't help.

I'm cramping a little bit and I'm worried. I wonder if I haven't screwed up something and I'm ovulating early. My brain tells me that everything is probably okay, but still, what if it's not? Sono and blood work in a few hours.....

Follie check - part three

Today's sono went well. At this point, I have about 15 good size follies on the right and 11 on the left, and all measure between 10-13mm. My lining is a nice 10mm, and things are moving along nicely. Amy, the nurse, said that she expects I'll trigger on Thursday, which puts us retrieval on Saturday. I am so happy that things are going well so far. I'm trying not to get too far ahead, but I can't help thinking about transfer.

ETA: E2 is 961. Follistim tonight and in the morning is 225 units, then drop Follistim to 150 tomorrow night and pick up the Menopur. Lupron stays at 2.5 units.

Follie check - part two

I had my second follie check this morning, and things are cooking in there. I was worried after Thursday's sono only showed 5 follies on the right and no action on the left. RE said that he was very pleased with my response so far and that my E2 on Thursday (87) was very good. So today's scan showed a lot of follie growth.... even though it looked like he was double counting some, he counted 18 follies (11 on the right and 7 on the left). I left a happy girl. I won't know my E2 from today given it's a Saturday, but RE adjusted my meds: Follistim goes to 225 units AM and PM and Menopur is suspended for a few days. Next check is Monday at 9:30.

ETA: E2 was 352.

Damn!

I had decided that I wasn't going to do all those stupid things I did with IVF #1... things like soaking my feet (to increase blood flow to the uterus and ovaries), eat eggs (I HATE eggs - except in cake) or drink protein shakes (eh! I burned out on them). All those ideas came from reading the online baby boards rather than my doctor so I thought that they probably didn't have much to do with the success of my last cycle. Maybe I was wrong to drop those things?

I went in for the first follie check this morning, and it seems that my left ovary is currently on strike. While the right has about 5 or 6 good size follies after 2 days of stims, the left has no activity.

Is my hope for another baby too much to ask?

ETA: E2 is 87 and the meds stay the same (225 units of Follistim in the AM, 150 units of Follistim in the PM + 75 units of Menopur). Now if I can just get my insurance company to approve the dang refills, life will be okay.

And we're off

I had my baseline sono and blood work yesterday, and all is well. I have at least 8 follicles on right and 6 on the left, which means that we could get 14 eggs. I feel like that's unlikely, but I am hopeful that we get a few good enough to get pregnant.

I started stims this morning. It was a little strange to be shooting up again, but here we are. I honestly can't remember everything I did last time, but I guess I'll be trying to keep my feet warm (something about warm feet increasing the blood flow to the uterus - who knows if it works?).

Headache

I had forgotten how miserable the Lupron headaches can be. It's even worse when you are fighting off a cold AND you have an 8 month with her very first cold. This sucks.

Sono and baseline blood work tomorrow. If all goes well, I start stimming on Tuesday and the Lupron drops to 2 1/2 units a day. Ahhhh, relief!

Waiting for AF

I am so glad that the birth control pills are done. I think they were seriously messing with my mind. Tuesday afternoon, I wanted to take ARB to the aquarium in Baltimore. When I got to the window, the woman told me that I couldn't take the stroller in and I would have to check it. Tears immediately stung my eyes and I felt like such a failure. A failure? The feelings were overwhelming, and it was pathetic.

The headaches are coming, I'm afraid.

Go for Lupron

My sono today revealed that there are no cysts, and I am good to start Lupron. Headaches - here I come!!

Meds!

I got my huge box of meds today, and I was a little overwhelmed at the number of needles included in the kit. Holy crap - and I have to shove each of them in my flesh. Nice. Sono tomorrow and then I start Lupron. Ugh! The headaches I could do without.

I've given up coffee for the second time in my life. The first was in the spring of 2008 before our IUI and IVF cycles. I love the taste of coffee, and it was one of the things I missed most throughout my pregnancy. I know there are studies to suggest that 1 cup won't make a difference, but I'm willing to give it up if it means that we can give ARB a sweet baby brother or sister. That is my main goal these days. It's a good one.

Go for launch

Or at least, we are go for our cycle. We do not need to postpone because of the gall bladder surgery, which is scheduled for tomorrow at 7 am. I'm a little scared, but ready to feel better. I've read lots and lots online that describe how a faulty gall bladder can cause all sorts of yucky feelings including scales on the soles of your feet. What?

So it looks like I will start Lupron next week assuming the birth control pills have done their job.

On our way - for now

I had the sonohystogram yesterday and all is clear for launch. I can't believe I'm all set to start Lupron next week. That is, assuming this gall bladder surgery doesn't interfere too much. I should know more tomorrow.

Delay

Crap - this is the response I got from the nurse when I asked if this stupid surgery would impact my cycle,

"... you can continue with the cycle. But if your Dr who is going to do your surgery tells your otherwise, then you will need to stop and wait a cycle."

My appointment with the surgeon isn't until Wednesday.

Randomness

It's an early Sunday evening, and ARB is finally in bed. She had a long day as MTB and I were out and about running here and there. She was so tired I put her down a few minutes early, and she's asleep. For now.

I found out this past week that I need to have my gall bladder removed. I'm hoping that it won't interfere with our IVF cycle, but the nurse hasn't returned my emails. I hope that having this thing out will make me feel better. Everyone whose had the surgery and everything I've read online suggests that I will.

I think these birth control pills are going to kill me. Or MTB. I go from nagging to mad to crying in about 10 1/2 seconds. It's getting old, and I feel powerless to deal with it.

I try to imagine having another baby in our home and it's hard. There are times by the end of the day that I am so ready for 5 minutes to myself, and I know that me-time will only get harder with another one around. Am I ready for another baby already?

Calendar

Got my calendar today. The nurse had to plan around travel schedules for me, RE and embryologist so I don't expect retrieval until the end of October. As of right now, my calendar looks like this...


Sept 14 - Start BCP
Sept 28 - Sonohystogram and mock transfer
Oct 8 - Sono and start Lupron (10 units)
Oct 14 - Last BCP
Oct 19 - Sono and labwork
Oct 20 - Start stims (Follistim and Menopur) and Dexamethasone (Lupron drops to 2.5 units)
Oct 31 - Possible retrieval
Nov 3 - Possible transfer (bedrest x 4 days)
Nov 13 - First beta

Not sure how 4 days of bed rest will go this time around. Last time I was extremely compliant, and I didn't move from the bed except for a super quick shower and bathroom breaks. Not sure it will go as easily this time with a 9 month old baby girl crawling everywhere even with extra help from MTB's mother. We'll see how set in stone that bed rest really is. Many RE's don't even prescribe it.

Still nervous.

Is this real?

I still don't have my calendar. How can I obsess if I don't have my calendar?


I took a home pregnancy test this morning. I've been feeling really tired and very sick for several days, and I thought it better to be safe than sorry. I just needed to know that I wasn't pregnant. I'm not.

Still scared about doing this again.

The second time around

I started birth control pills today. It always seems a little weird to begin this most aggressive form of fertility treatments with birth control pills. Of course, I understand why I'm taking them, but it still seems paradoxical.

As the thought of actually going through another IVF has started to sink in, I'm filled with anxiety and fear. How hard is this going to be when chasing ARB around the room? How will the drugs effect me this time? Will I still get those horrible Lupron headaches again? How am I going to manage ER and ET with ARB? What if this doesn't work? MTB and I had a major heart to heart the other day, and I think he's forgotten how hard this process is on the body. I think I had forgotten about it too.

I should get my calendar tomorrow.